Sarsaparilla Alphabet #3

C - CHINCHILLA

Rocky crawled out of his cage and into Karen's hands. His platinum fur was especially fluffy today – that hard work was worth something! Her hand ran over the chinchilla's back, and he responded with a chirp, which was followed by her cell phone's ring. She set Rocky down on the floor and answered it.

Aww... hey, what's that? He wandered over and nibbled. Mmm. Leftover carrot. Sweet. Is that more? Rocky shuffled past the door and came upon the air vent, which Karen had taken off to clean. What's that delicious smell? It's coming from down here...

And Rocky tumbled down the air vent. Thankfully, he managed to fall straight down instead of bumping into the sides. He must have been one lucky chinchilla, as he landed in a big pile of clean laundry. Crawling out, he heard a voice shout to him. Peering out of an undershirt's collar, he spotted a gray mouse. "Hi there," the chinchilla chirped.

"You must be Rocky," the mouse said, scratching his stomach. "We hear a lot about you down here, y'know... mostly about how 'fluffy wuffy' you are. It must be nice."

"Oh, you have no idea. I get awesome food and all the water I want, but the best part is the petting and scratches. It's like all of your troubles go away and you kind of fall asleep." Rocky thought about it and giggled.

"C'mere, lemme show you around the place." Rocky obliged and met the mouse on eye-level, who introduced himself as Takk. "Right through this hole is the place where everybody chills after a day with her."

"Her?"

"The neighborhood cat, Vera. What, do you not know that cats eat guys like us?"

"They do what? Eat us? Like... eating a carrot?"

"Do your carrots bleed and cry for their mother as their limbs are ripped off?"

"Oh god. No, that's... oh god. Horrifying. No. That's... oh god."

"Hey hey hey, buddy. Calm down, come get a drink."

The two rodents walked over to where the refrigerator had leaked into the basement. Rocky opened his mouth and let some of the yellow liquid drip into his mouth due to Takk's insistence. A tear came down Rocky's face. "It's... beautiful... it almost tastes like... morning dew on the fresh grass on the side of a mountain." It felt like a hundred Karens were petting his entire body at once.

Takk, however, thought that the stuff tasted like urine, but it at least got his mind off of the cat and let him focus on his new friend. He also briefly forgot the 46 kids that were either currently with his wife or off scavenging for food in the kitchen. He forgot about Suð, who was the dumbest mouse in all of existence. Takk couldn't understand how he was still alive. He forgot almost everything else. But he also got an idea.

"Hey Rocky. Do you like it down here?"

"Yeah... I love it! It's so... different. So real. So wonderful. Everyone seems to know everyone, too."

"What if... you and I... switched places? You know, you can stay down here for a while and meet everyone and really get the whole mouse experience and I go up and see what the easy life is like. It wouldn't be forever. I'd find a way to make it back at some point."

"Oh, but Karen could easy tell us apart! Let's see. First, let's fluff you all up." Takk did this, and Rocky tilted his head to the left. "Mm. Not perfect, but it should be close enough. Now hurry back into the laundry! Karen's probably looking for me and she might have realized that the air duct cover was off."

Takk climbed into the pile of clothes, after Rocky reminded him to look "extra helpless." And five minutes later, Karen threw open the basement door and ran about the room, searching every nook and cranny. She stopped when she heard something moving and chirping, and she chirped, herself. "Rocky! Oh, I'm so sorry, I was on the phone! I should have never let you run around. Come on, let's go sit down and you can eat a big bag of carrots. I bet you're all worked up, too."

As Karen picked up the laundry basket, Takk shuffled to the side. He saw Rocky standing at the hole in the wall, and he waved. "Thanks for everything!" Rocky smiled and waved back. "No, thank you."