J - JAR
He was just in the middle of eating. No one should be taken away while they're eating. Nor should they be placed into a glass container. But this is the situation that the caterpillar found himself in.
There are some parasites that find their ways inside caterpillars, usually by laying their eggs inside the thing's head. Once the young are able to, they seize control of the caterpillar's head and turn it into a cute, little zombie. While human zombies are inexplicably drawn to brains, the caterpillar zombie is drawn to the top of a plant, where it can be seen in plain sight. This, of course, provides a wonderfully easy dinner for a bird, which is where the parasite find itself next. Feeding off the bird, it eventually reaches maturity around the same time that it finds itself outside of the bird. This, however, was not as horrible as what our caterpillar was experiencing.
He found that he wasn't alone. There was a stick, too. Oh, and some leaves from a nearby oak tree. He didn't really like oak leaves. He preferred maple.
And then, the sun disappeared from the sky, yet it was still oddly bright where the caterpillar was. It sounded as if God was replacing a lightbulb. The caterpillar was then thrust upward like a rocket and he smacked against the hard sides of his new home. Out of fatigued eyes he saw a great, blurred figure. "If this is God, I wish He weren't so hard to see," thought the squishy thing. He hadn't decided whether he liked God or not. He didn't know whether he liked his new home or his new friends, either.
Then came a muffled shout, and the world shook and was slammed down. Things were quiet, but it was an unstill quiet, where the caterpillar was granted a second to become absolutely terrified. And then the great Thing blocking the sun bent with a great WHUMP. The three amigos were thrown around by it, and again by another. The sun once again shined down, but only bleakly. This was rectified when another series of WHUMPs ensued. And then, they heard the voice of God.
"See, he's got everything a bug needs... food, air, light, and a stick... y'know, for... fun. Do caterpillars eat sticks? I know they eat leaves, but maybe he'd like a stick, too."
And then they moved to a dusty room. Unlike his home, this one was dark, the air was choking, and it was dry. Very dry. Apparently the caterpillar, the stick, and the leaves (which weren't all that tasty) had to condense the dusty, dry air themselves.
And so things went like this for a few days. The caterpillar even managed to climb up the stick before it slipped and he fell to the floor. He contemplated inventing caterpillar origami. But the biggest problem for him was not how to create interesting shapes out of leaves, but surviving. He was hungry and thirsty, but God never showed up. He'd come into the same room, but he never acknowledged the jar, nevermind what was inside of it. On the one occassion that he did, he wondered aloud when the caterpillar would change into a butterfly. He dreamed of the miracle of life that would occur in his room, nay, in HIS jar! He would be capable of seeing the stuff of elementary school science textbooks in real life, and then, one day, he would let the butterfly go and its wonderous colors would shimmer in the sunlight as it flitted across the sky.
The next day, he discovered that his caterpillar had died. What he didn't discover, however, was that this particular species of caterpillar never turned into butterflies.
Showing posts with label animals. Show all posts
Showing posts with label animals. Show all posts
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Sarsaparilla Alphabet #5
E - ELEPHANT
The man rode atop the elephant, in a fancy, wooden box that resembled a castle tower. Rapunzel let down her golden ladder and he climbed out of his box and into the castle window. They talked about elephants and castles and the like, so much so, that whenever he came to her room, he was filled with the warmest glow that made his face shine brighter than the sun. Eventually, the sunlight made his heart grow flowers, which he picked and gave to Rapunzel whenever they were in full bloom. They made love, but the man had never experienced anything so intense, so wild. Her hair seemed more brilliant each day.
A number of months later, however, he noticed that her once-brilliant locks were dulling. When they made love, all of those feelings returned and her hair once again shone, illuminating the entire castle. But Rapunzel was concerned with how far apart their worlds were – her in her castle, and the man on top of his elephant. The man was bewildered. She was just a short climb away, this was nonsense! But Rapunzel truly did love him, so she continued to let down her hair, but told him that each day, it would be just a little bit shorter.
The man continued to enjoy each day that he was her as if he was the richest man in the world, but he was still aware of what was to come. When her hair was just out of reach, he would jump from his box, despite the fact that he couldn't jump very high at all. One day, however, he climbed into Rapunzel's room to find another man, who didn't own an elephant. In fact, he merely walked on the ground and Rapunzel hair had, in fact, been getting longer each day. The man stared in disbelief. Rapunzel's hair shined brighter than the sun. The man's garden had not been tended to and a final, devastating thundercloud appeared in his chest.
Rapunzel offered to continue talking to him, but the man would have to yell at her while she stood by the castle's window. Many times, he considered destroying, burning, and throwing the castle off of the elephant's back, but the sun was always behind the thundercloud, just waiting for its chance to seize control of the sky. The man decided that this chance was one worth taking and continued talking to Rapunzel as he rode his elephant across the desert.
The man rode atop the elephant, in a fancy, wooden box that resembled a castle tower. Rapunzel let down her golden ladder and he climbed out of his box and into the castle window. They talked about elephants and castles and the like, so much so, that whenever he came to her room, he was filled with the warmest glow that made his face shine brighter than the sun. Eventually, the sunlight made his heart grow flowers, which he picked and gave to Rapunzel whenever they were in full bloom. They made love, but the man had never experienced anything so intense, so wild. Her hair seemed more brilliant each day.
A number of months later, however, he noticed that her once-brilliant locks were dulling. When they made love, all of those feelings returned and her hair once again shone, illuminating the entire castle. But Rapunzel was concerned with how far apart their worlds were – her in her castle, and the man on top of his elephant. The man was bewildered. She was just a short climb away, this was nonsense! But Rapunzel truly did love him, so she continued to let down her hair, but told him that each day, it would be just a little bit shorter.
The man continued to enjoy each day that he was her as if he was the richest man in the world, but he was still aware of what was to come. When her hair was just out of reach, he would jump from his box, despite the fact that he couldn't jump very high at all. One day, however, he climbed into Rapunzel's room to find another man, who didn't own an elephant. In fact, he merely walked on the ground and Rapunzel hair had, in fact, been getting longer each day. The man stared in disbelief. Rapunzel's hair shined brighter than the sun. The man's garden had not been tended to and a final, devastating thundercloud appeared in his chest.
Rapunzel offered to continue talking to him, but the man would have to yell at her while she stood by the castle's window. Many times, he considered destroying, burning, and throwing the castle off of the elephant's back, but the sun was always behind the thundercloud, just waiting for its chance to seize control of the sky. The man decided that this chance was one worth taking and continued talking to Rapunzel as he rode his elephant across the desert.
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Sarsaparilla Alphabet #4
D - DRUNK
It was Clay and Sienna's first time. No, they weren't close like that, but they had grown up together in the same neighborhood – three doors down, across the street, to be exact. On the coffee table sat a bottle of Rainbeau Melt.
"Hmph," said Clay, begrudgingly. "Let's just do it."
"The whole thing? Isn't that dangerous?"
"We won't know until we try it."
Clay uncorked the bottle and, with a loud SCWHOP!, it was open and emitting a light blue mist. He poured it into the first two glasses that he found, which were etched with the names of two different restaurants. "Bottoms up," Clay said, and they clinked their glasses together. They drank deep. It was sweet. They drank another glass. The taste was even sweeter. "Pretty good, huh?" asked Clay. Sienna shrieked. "Clay! Your tongue! It's... got every color on it!"
It was true, or at to her eyes. Almost like stripes on a rugby shirt, his tongue had been painted with vertical lines of white, red, black, yellow, orange, blue, green, and purple, from left to right. Clay saw everything only in the colors of the most beautiful sunset ever. Sienna was a brilliant vermilion.
The colors began to become more intense, as if their tint dials on their eyes were turned to their maximum. Clay's eyes filled with color in his eyes, still nicely organized, until they gushed out of his sockets. The paint flooded the room, until it seemed impossible that any more could fit. Then, everything went white.
A splot of red. Bright blue slightly to the right of it. Green dripped. Slowly. Then, a torrential downpour of every color that one could think of (there might have been some sort of ultraviolet color in there, as well) drenched the white world until it tilted, and the colors slid down the slope.
Toucan Sam started singing in a rainforest filled with tall trees with orange leaves. Blue orangutans swung amongst them. Thousands of ants streamed out of a series of mountains, each one a different color, before being eaten by three hungry anteaters.
The paint fell out of the sterile, white room and drenched the rainforest. The anteaters sported polka dots. The blue orangutans were orange. Toucan Sam tripled the number of colors on his beak. The paint rain got heavier, until the sky was black.
Sienna woke up first, and she shook Clay awake. He had been dreaming of soldiers storming Omaha Beach, but instead of bullets, their guns shot globs of color. Once they had realized that they couldn't kill each other with color, the soldiers painted faces on each other and drew vast landscapes in the sand.
Clay and Sienna both stood up, grabbed the bottle, and put it back in the cabinet that they found it in. Sitting down at the kitchen table, they stared at the off-white wall, trying to make sense of what they had just dreamed.
It was Clay and Sienna's first time. No, they weren't close like that, but they had grown up together in the same neighborhood – three doors down, across the street, to be exact. On the coffee table sat a bottle of Rainbeau Melt.
"Hmph," said Clay, begrudgingly. "Let's just do it."
"The whole thing? Isn't that dangerous?"
"We won't know until we try it."
Clay uncorked the bottle and, with a loud SCWHOP!, it was open and emitting a light blue mist. He poured it into the first two glasses that he found, which were etched with the names of two different restaurants. "Bottoms up," Clay said, and they clinked their glasses together. They drank deep. It was sweet. They drank another glass. The taste was even sweeter. "Pretty good, huh?" asked Clay. Sienna shrieked. "Clay! Your tongue! It's... got every color on it!"
It was true, or at to her eyes. Almost like stripes on a rugby shirt, his tongue had been painted with vertical lines of white, red, black, yellow, orange, blue, green, and purple, from left to right. Clay saw everything only in the colors of the most beautiful sunset ever. Sienna was a brilliant vermilion.
The colors began to become more intense, as if their tint dials on their eyes were turned to their maximum. Clay's eyes filled with color in his eyes, still nicely organized, until they gushed out of his sockets. The paint flooded the room, until it seemed impossible that any more could fit. Then, everything went white.
A splot of red. Bright blue slightly to the right of it. Green dripped. Slowly. Then, a torrential downpour of every color that one could think of (there might have been some sort of ultraviolet color in there, as well) drenched the white world until it tilted, and the colors slid down the slope.
Toucan Sam started singing in a rainforest filled with tall trees with orange leaves. Blue orangutans swung amongst them. Thousands of ants streamed out of a series of mountains, each one a different color, before being eaten by three hungry anteaters.
The paint fell out of the sterile, white room and drenched the rainforest. The anteaters sported polka dots. The blue orangutans were orange. Toucan Sam tripled the number of colors on his beak. The paint rain got heavier, until the sky was black.
Sienna woke up first, and she shook Clay awake. He had been dreaming of soldiers storming Omaha Beach, but instead of bullets, their guns shot globs of color. Once they had realized that they couldn't kill each other with color, the soldiers painted faces on each other and drew vast landscapes in the sand.
Clay and Sienna both stood up, grabbed the bottle, and put it back in the cabinet that they found it in. Sitting down at the kitchen table, they stared at the off-white wall, trying to make sense of what they had just dreamed.
Monday, December 15, 2008
Sarsaparilla Alphabet #3
C - CHINCHILLA
Rocky crawled out of his cage and into Karen's hands. His platinum fur was especially fluffy today – that hard work was worth something! Her hand ran over the chinchilla's back, and he responded with a chirp, which was followed by her cell phone's ring. She set Rocky down on the floor and answered it.
Aww... hey, what's that? He wandered over and nibbled. Mmm. Leftover carrot. Sweet. Is that more? Rocky shuffled past the door and came upon the air vent, which Karen had taken off to clean. What's that delicious smell? It's coming from down here...
And Rocky tumbled down the air vent. Thankfully, he managed to fall straight down instead of bumping into the sides. He must have been one lucky chinchilla, as he landed in a big pile of clean laundry. Crawling out, he heard a voice shout to him. Peering out of an undershirt's collar, he spotted a gray mouse. "Hi there," the chinchilla chirped.
"You must be Rocky," the mouse said, scratching his stomach. "We hear a lot about you down here, y'know... mostly about how 'fluffy wuffy' you are. It must be nice."
"Oh, you have no idea. I get awesome food and all the water I want, but the best part is the petting and scratches. It's like all of your troubles go away and you kind of fall asleep." Rocky thought about it and giggled.
"C'mere, lemme show you around the place." Rocky obliged and met the mouse on eye-level, who introduced himself as Takk. "Right through this hole is the place where everybody chills after a day with her."
"Her?"
"The neighborhood cat, Vera. What, do you not know that cats eat guys like us?"
"They do what? Eat us? Like... eating a carrot?"
"Do your carrots bleed and cry for their mother as their limbs are ripped off?"
"Oh god. No, that's... oh god. Horrifying. No. That's... oh god."
"Hey hey hey, buddy. Calm down, come get a drink."
The two rodents walked over to where the refrigerator had leaked into the basement. Rocky opened his mouth and let some of the yellow liquid drip into his mouth due to Takk's insistence. A tear came down Rocky's face. "It's... beautiful... it almost tastes like... morning dew on the fresh grass on the side of a mountain." It felt like a hundred Karens were petting his entire body at once.
Takk, however, thought that the stuff tasted like urine, but it at least got his mind off of the cat and let him focus on his new friend. He also briefly forgot the 46 kids that were either currently with his wife or off scavenging for food in the kitchen. He forgot about Suð, who was the dumbest mouse in all of existence. Takk couldn't understand how he was still alive. He forgot almost everything else. But he also got an idea.
"Hey Rocky. Do you like it down here?"
"Yeah... I love it! It's so... different. So real. So wonderful. Everyone seems to know everyone, too."
"What if... you and I... switched places? You know, you can stay down here for a while and meet everyone and really get the whole mouse experience and I go up and see what the easy life is like. It wouldn't be forever. I'd find a way to make it back at some point."
"Oh, but Karen could easy tell us apart! Let's see. First, let's fluff you all up." Takk did this, and Rocky tilted his head to the left. "Mm. Not perfect, but it should be close enough. Now hurry back into the laundry! Karen's probably looking for me and she might have realized that the air duct cover was off."
Takk climbed into the pile of clothes, after Rocky reminded him to look "extra helpless." And five minutes later, Karen threw open the basement door and ran about the room, searching every nook and cranny. She stopped when she heard something moving and chirping, and she chirped, herself. "Rocky! Oh, I'm so sorry, I was on the phone! I should have never let you run around. Come on, let's go sit down and you can eat a big bag of carrots. I bet you're all worked up, too."
As Karen picked up the laundry basket, Takk shuffled to the side. He saw Rocky standing at the hole in the wall, and he waved. "Thanks for everything!" Rocky smiled and waved back. "No, thank you."
Rocky crawled out of his cage and into Karen's hands. His platinum fur was especially fluffy today – that hard work was worth something! Her hand ran over the chinchilla's back, and he responded with a chirp, which was followed by her cell phone's ring. She set Rocky down on the floor and answered it.
Aww... hey, what's that? He wandered over and nibbled. Mmm. Leftover carrot. Sweet. Is that more? Rocky shuffled past the door and came upon the air vent, which Karen had taken off to clean. What's that delicious smell? It's coming from down here...
And Rocky tumbled down the air vent. Thankfully, he managed to fall straight down instead of bumping into the sides. He must have been one lucky chinchilla, as he landed in a big pile of clean laundry. Crawling out, he heard a voice shout to him. Peering out of an undershirt's collar, he spotted a gray mouse. "Hi there," the chinchilla chirped.
"You must be Rocky," the mouse said, scratching his stomach. "We hear a lot about you down here, y'know... mostly about how 'fluffy wuffy' you are. It must be nice."
"Oh, you have no idea. I get awesome food and all the water I want, but the best part is the petting and scratches. It's like all of your troubles go away and you kind of fall asleep." Rocky thought about it and giggled.
"C'mere, lemme show you around the place." Rocky obliged and met the mouse on eye-level, who introduced himself as Takk. "Right through this hole is the place where everybody chills after a day with her."
"Her?"
"The neighborhood cat, Vera. What, do you not know that cats eat guys like us?"
"They do what? Eat us? Like... eating a carrot?"
"Do your carrots bleed and cry for their mother as their limbs are ripped off?"
"Oh god. No, that's... oh god. Horrifying. No. That's... oh god."
"Hey hey hey, buddy. Calm down, come get a drink."
The two rodents walked over to where the refrigerator had leaked into the basement. Rocky opened his mouth and let some of the yellow liquid drip into his mouth due to Takk's insistence. A tear came down Rocky's face. "It's... beautiful... it almost tastes like... morning dew on the fresh grass on the side of a mountain." It felt like a hundred Karens were petting his entire body at once.
Takk, however, thought that the stuff tasted like urine, but it at least got his mind off of the cat and let him focus on his new friend. He also briefly forgot the 46 kids that were either currently with his wife or off scavenging for food in the kitchen. He forgot about Suð, who was the dumbest mouse in all of existence. Takk couldn't understand how he was still alive. He forgot almost everything else. But he also got an idea.
"Hey Rocky. Do you like it down here?"
"Yeah... I love it! It's so... different. So real. So wonderful. Everyone seems to know everyone, too."
"What if... you and I... switched places? You know, you can stay down here for a while and meet everyone and really get the whole mouse experience and I go up and see what the easy life is like. It wouldn't be forever. I'd find a way to make it back at some point."
"Oh, but Karen could easy tell us apart! Let's see. First, let's fluff you all up." Takk did this, and Rocky tilted his head to the left. "Mm. Not perfect, but it should be close enough. Now hurry back into the laundry! Karen's probably looking for me and she might have realized that the air duct cover was off."
Takk climbed into the pile of clothes, after Rocky reminded him to look "extra helpless." And five minutes later, Karen threw open the basement door and ran about the room, searching every nook and cranny. She stopped when she heard something moving and chirping, and she chirped, herself. "Rocky! Oh, I'm so sorry, I was on the phone! I should have never let you run around. Come on, let's go sit down and you can eat a big bag of carrots. I bet you're all worked up, too."
As Karen picked up the laundry basket, Takk shuffled to the side. He saw Rocky standing at the hole in the wall, and he waved. "Thanks for everything!" Rocky smiled and waved back. "No, thank you."
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